Being Bitchy is Not Feminism

It seems somewhere along our struggle to gain equal rights and pay, we have given ourselves permission to be jerks, ladies.

Why are we taking internet quizzes to determine how bitchy we are, then proudly boasting our high scores on social network sites for friends, family and God knows who else to see?

Why has bitchiness become a badge of honor?

I often struggle with making my voice heard at work among my male colleagues, and it has even been said that women have to be bitches to excel in this industry.

Tina Fey even said famously on SNL ‘bitches get things done’ in response to a negative comment about Hilary Clinton.

It can be deduced that we as women have taken a negativity, or insult, and spun it to instead characterize our strength and resistance to common female stereotypes.

And I get it. And I like the idea.

But somehow we have forgotten that we were trying to redefine the word and have instead created a new stereotype.

That ‘bitches’ are the only women to get stuff done.

And we are proud to be hateful jerks.

That is not feminism.

So if you score high on a ridiculous internet quiz because you refuse to take crap from elderly people that cut line or children that are loud, please don’t brag about it.

Because that is one step back for us, ladies, not forward.

Feminism is helping the older person with the groceries and distracting a child with a funny face.

It is firmly and calmly standing your ground to make others respect your rights, not bullying or demanding that they be recognized.

I don’t want my coworkers to say I am ‘a bitch that gets stuff done’.I want them to say I am a talented hard worker that earns respect through my productivity and integrity. And pretty cool to hang out with, too.

Because You don’t have to be a bitch to be respected.

So don’t call me a bitch. And don’t call yourself one either. We are both better than that. We are strong, we are talented, we are wise. We deserve respect because we command it; not from our words, but from our productivity and from our good deeds. Which should be the same thing.


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